Good Week For...

English Hubris

Nothing could stop England in the early part of the week as the tourists cruised to facile tour victories in South Africa.

The Sun raced to hail the real cricketer of 2009: 'Strauss a real gem... Andrew Strauss was in diamond country continued his 24-carat start to England's tour.'

And the Daily Mirror had equally high hopes for the next generation: 'Denly's a 24-carat diamond'

Unfortunately, as any fool but no tabloid sub-editor knows, gold is measured up to 24 carats but diamonds can go over 100 carats.

By the middle of the week it all seemed brilliantly appropriate: bundled out pathetically against South Africa 'A', the true value of England's form is about one quarter of that projected by their overexcited red-top tabs.

BBC

The Ashes look set to return to terrestrial television. When they were taken away it was greeted as a backwards step but English cricket has since come to rely on the money provided by Sky's patronage.

It seems that every man and his dog thinks this a return to free-to-air television will harm English cricket.

In any case why this feast or famine approach for free-to-air viewers? More than live Ashes Tests the free-to-air TV cricket fan might appreciate more all series being given a decent highlights programme.

Matthew Hoggard

From a distance, the former England bowler appears to have had a torrid time the last couple of years.

Bundled out of the England team unaware that this signalled the end of his international career, he has suffered a similar fate at Yorkshire though without the ignominy of being overlooked for Darren Pattinson. Then he had to find a new personality after exhausting the madcap, helicopter-hat waving simpleton routine that has kept him in the nation's affections.

Hoggard fans have always insisted that there had to be a much shrewder cricket brain behind the caricature, although his long-time colleague Michael Vaughan is ambiguous on this point in his new autobiography. As captain of Leicestershire for the next three years Hoggard has the chance to prove a point to the many people he feels have wronged him.

Bad Week For...

South Africa-England Relations

First Mickey Arthur admits that Jonathan Trott's England career rankles.

Then the Proteas make an approach for English rose/bulldog Craig Kieswetter, sparking fears that they will try to kidnap Kevin Pietersen and Trott during the Test series.

Now Graeme Smith is stirring the pot with all the wit and subtlety we have come to expect.

In an attack some would say looks like a crude 'targetting' of his opposite number, he said: 'Strauss needs to stamp his authority on the England environment, so it is interesting that he feels he can take a week off.

'It's ideal as captain to play in every form of the game. It's difficult to keep chopping and changing. From Andy Flower's perspective, he'll be working with a different captain with different views and that doesn't help the search for consistency.'

Odd. We'd have thought Smith would be delighted. When he pulls up huffing and puffing with a stitch after 17 balls in the first Twenty20 International, the timorous Paul Collingwood is much more likely to allow his heavyweight counterpart a runner or even a mobility scooter.

Tradition

It is possible that the Sydney Cricket Ground will not host a 2010-11 Ashes Test as Australia follows England in prioritising income in selecting their stadia.

"It's about finding the best deal going forward," NSW boss Dave Gilbert said.

Forward not back. Well, it worked for East Germany.

Sir Vivian Richards

The great man has weighed into the debate on England's touring Springboks, claiming that you can only be English or South African. His example? Allan Lamb.

Is this the same Allan Lamb who at Brisbane in 1990-1 spoiled his first outing as England captain by having a late night at a casino with Kerry Packer mid-Test, 10 not out in a total of 56 for three overnight and out first thing the next morning?

The same Allan Lamb who averaged mid-30s in Test cricket and who was repeatedly criticised for playing for his average rather than the team?

The same Allan Lamb who spent much of the 1980s as a drinking crony of Ian Botha... oh, we get it now.

Peter May