Top 10 quotable quotes from KP's Academy website

Former England batsman Kevin Pietersen launched his Dubai-based Academy on Wednesday, complete with a flashy website. We trawled it in search of some notable, if sometimes poorly written, quotes.
Former England batsman Kevin Pietersen launched his Dubai-based Academy on Wednesday, complete with a flashy website. We trawled it in search of some notable, if sometimes poorly written, quotes.
1. <i>"I have been extremely fortunate to play cricket at the highest level. My mentality, work ethic and belief in my own ability have been instrumental in helping me achieve some of my personal goals and helped me contribute to successful team performances."</i>
Self belief is a big theme.
2. <i>"MEET, LEARN FROM AND BE INSPIRED BY ONE OF THE BEST BATSMAN IN THE WORLD!"</i>
In big green letters, with a noticeable typo. If you're going to punt yourself, make sure your copy editors are on the proverbial ball.
3. <i>"Behind the scenes KP is one of the hardest working cricketers in the world. Whether it is fitness or skills training, KP has always demanded the very best from himself."</i>
This is true, by all accounts. Even his critics would admit that KP is a machine in training, often whistling while he works.
4. <i>"KP has personally formulated the coaching philosophy that is at the heart of everything the team deliver."</i>
What we would give to be a fly on the wall during his pep talks.
5. <i>"Parents are welcome to stay and watch the sessions each day but all our coaches are fully qualified and hold all the relevant documentation that ensures that all the children are in safe hands."</i>
But not literally in their hands. Police clearances? Check.
6. <i>"English club and minor county cricket boasts some fantastically talented players. A number of the players who are successful at this level are aspiring to greater things and simply play for the true love of the game."</i>
Hopefully an 'Avoid bookies and fixers' course is included.
7. <i>"Players will regularly use bowling machines, a wide range of innovative fielding equipment and have their bowling measured by speed guns to see how they compare to the modern day stars that KP has to face day in day out."</i>
Well, it depends on the T20 league he's in at the time.
8. <i>"KP owes a huge amount to the cricket that he was exposed to at school from a very young age."</i>
So this will be a South African-style coaching programme?
9. <i>"Natural talent, flair and innovation are at the heart of what the Academy will encourage and nurture."</i>
So you might bat for England, but you won't captain them. Funkiness is reserved for Aussies.
10. <i>'KP's overwhelming self belief and mental toughness is something that all young players should aspire to!"</i>
A quote from an unknown 'people'. True enough, we suppose.
PS: None of the quotes have been edited by us, so all typos/grammatical errors are theirs.
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